75+ Best Shrek Quotes

The first Shrek movie came out in 2001 and enchanted crowds, all things considered! The whimsical fantasy story and a horde of characters charmed youngsters. These Shrek quotes will entertain and inspire you to find happiness within.

The grown-up humor wound through the film flawlessly and kept the guardians locked in. It was such a hit that it sent off an establishment of monster films. Mike Meyers, as the voice of Shrek, took the core of millions while reminding every one of us to be our legitimate selves and that genuine excellence is found within.

Shrek is loaded up with bunches of important characters, yet Donkey, voiced by Eddie Murphy, is without a doubt the masterpiece. Throughout the movie, he has many humorous jokes, for the most part about not having any companions! Unfortunate Donkey!

In order to save such memorable and hilarious quotes, here we have gathered the best Shrek quotes that include, Shrek Quotes about friendship, Shrek quotes that made the adults laugh, Shrek quotes that will make your day, Funny Shrek quotes, Memorable Shrek quotes, and Short Shrek quotes for you guys to enjoy.

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Shrek quotes

Shrek Quotes about friendship

Wow. Let’s do that again. –Donkey

Wow, only a true friend would be that truly honest. –Donkey

No! I’m an ogre! You know, Grab your torch and pitchforks! Doesn’t that bother you? – Shrek

Well it’s no wonder you don’t have any friends. – Shrek

Because that’s what friends do, they FORGIVE EACH OTHER. – Donkey

This’ll be fun. We’ll stay up late, swapping manly stories, and in the morning… I’m making waffles. – Donkey

Please. I don’t wanna go back there. You don’t know what it’s like to be considered a freak… Well, maybe you do, but that’s why we gotta stick together. You gotta let me stay! – Donkey

Wow, that was really scary and if you don’t mind me saying, if that don’t work, your breath will certainly get the job done, ’cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs or something ’cause your breath STINKS. – Donkey

Ogres are like onions. – Shrek

Man, you gotta warn somebody before you crack one like that. My mouth was open and everything. – Donkey

And then one time I ate some rotten berries. Man, there were some strong gases eeking outta my butt that day. – Donkey

Donkey, if that was me, you’d be dead. That’s brimstone… we must be getting close. – Shrek

Yeah, right, brimstone, don’t be talking about no brimstone. I know what I smelt and it wasn’t no brimstone and it didn’t come off no stone neither. – Donkey

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Shrek quotes

 Shrek quotes that made the adults laugh

Five shillings for the possessed toy. Take it away. –Captain of Guards

You might have seen a housefly, maybe even a superfly, but I bet you ain’t never seen a donkey fly. – Donkey

Whoa. Look at that. Who’d wanna live in a place like that? – Donkey That would be my home. – Shrek

Y’know, me too. That’s another thing we have in common. I hate it when you’ve got someone in your face, you try to give someone a hint and they won’t leave, and then there’s that big awkward silence… – Donkey

He hooffed unt he poooffed unt he… signed an eviction notice. – Little Pig

Although she lives with seven other men, she’s not easy. –Magic Mirror

Do you think he’s maybe compensating for something? –Shrek

I just know, before this is over, I’m gonna need a whole lot of serious therapy. Look at my eye twitchin’. – Donkey

Some of you may die, but its a sacrifice I’m willing to make. – Lord Farquaad

What kind of a knight are you? – Princess Fiona One of a kind. – Shrek

Eat me. Gingerbread Man

C’mon, princess, you’re not that ugly. All right, you are ugly. But you’re only like this at night. Shrek’s ugly 24/7. – Donkey

Huh, celebrity marriages. They never last, do they? – Donkey

Can I stay with you? Please? – Donkey Of course. – Shrek Really? –Donkey NO.- Shrek

Don’t mess wit’ me. I’m the Stair Master. I’ve Mastered the Stairs. I wish I had a step right here, I could step here and here and here and step all over it. – Donkey

Sure it’s big enough… but look at the location. – Shrek

If you’re enjoying these quotes, make sure to read our collection of Fleabag quotes that relate to every aspect of your day-to-day life.

I’m not a puppet. I’m a real boy. – Pinocchio

Yes, I know the muffin man. Who lives on Drury Lane? – Lord Farquaad

Okay, let me get this straight: you gonna go fight a dragon and rescue a princess just so Farquaad’ll give you back your swamp, which you only don’t have ‘cos he filled it full of freaks in the first place, is that about right? – Donkey

Oh, what large teeth you have. I mean white sparkly teeth, I know you probably hear this all the time from your food but you must bleach or something, ’cause that’s one dazzling smile you got there and do I detect a hint of minty freshness? – Donkey

What are you doing? You know, you should sweep me off my feet out yonder window and down a rope onto your valiant steed. – Princess Fiona

The Princess will be up the stairs in the highest room in the tallest tower. – Shrek

So where is this fire-breathin’ pain in the neck, anyway? – Donkey In the tower, waiting for us to rescue her. – Shrek I was talkin’ about the dragon, Shrek. – Donkey

I’m not the monster here. You are. You and the rest of that fairy tale trash, poisoning my perfect world. Now, tell me! Where are the others?! –Lord Farquaad

You didn’t slay the dragon? – Princess Fiona It’s on my to do list. Now come on. – Shrek

But this isn’t right. You’re meant to charge in, sword drawn, banner flying-that’s what all the other knights did. – Princess Fiona Yeah, right before they burst into flame. – Shrek

Once upon a time, there was a lovely princess. But she had an enchantment upon her of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love’s first kiss. She was locked away in a castle guarded by a terrible fire-breathing dragon. Many brave knights had attempted to free her from this dreadful prison, but none prevailed. She waited in the dragon’s keep, in the highest room of the tallest tower, for her true love, and true love’s first kiss. – Shrek

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Funny Shrek quotes

All right, you’re going the right way for a smack bottom. – Shrek

Well, that’s not very nice. – Shrek

Thank you, thank you very much. I’m here ’til Thursday. Try the veal. – Shrek

NO. Layers. Onions have layers. Ogres have layers. Onions have layers. You get it? We both have layers. – Shrek

That’ll do, Donkey. That’ll do. – Shrek

Donkey, two things okay? Shut… up. – Shrek

Oh, would you look at that. – Shrek

Well, I have to save my ass. – Shrek

Like that’s ever gonna happen. What a load of… – Shrek

Little donkey. Take a look at me, what am I? – Shrek

Shrek quotes

 Shrek quotes that will make your day

Now really, it’s rude enough being alive when no one wants you, but showing up uninvited to a wedding?— Lord Farquaad

It’s On My To-Do List! – Shrek

Shrek: You know what? Maybe there’s a good reason donkeys shouldn’t talk.— Shrek

Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns. Man, this would be so much easier if I wasn’t color-blind. – Donkey

My donkey fell in your waffle hole.— Shrek

I have a bit of a confession to make: donkeys don’t have layers. We wear our fear right there on our sleeves. – Donkey

Well, actually, that would be a giant. Now, ogres – oh, they’re much worse. They’ll make a suit from your freshly peeled skin! They’ll shave your liver, squeeze the jelly from your eyes! Actually, it’s quite good on toast. — Shrek

What’s that? It’s hideous! – Lord Farquaad

Well, that’s not very nice. It’s just a donkey. — Shrek

The stars don’t tell the future. They tell stories. — Shrek

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Memorable Shrek quotes

All right, you’re going the right way for a smacked bottom. — Shrek

Someday, I Will Repay You. Unless, Of Course, I Can’t Find You Or If I Forget. — Shrek

Yeah, it’s getting him to shut up that’s the trick!— Shrek

A Cute, Button Nose? Thick, Wavy Locks? Taut, Round Buttocks? — Shrek

I’m going to be a father, how did this happen? — Shrek

It’s not supposed to be an ogre! – Princess Fiona

Nobody said I have the right to remain silent! – Donkey

Don’t worry, princess. I used to be afraid of the dark until… No, wait. I’m still afraid of the dark. – Donkey

Donkey, you have the right to remain silent. What you lack is the capacity. — Shrek

You can’t tell me you’re afraid of heights? — Shrek

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Shrek quotes

Short Shrek quotes

You know Donkey, sometimes things are more than they appear.— Shrek

[looks at Farquaad’s very large castle] Gee, you think he’s compensating for something? — Shrek

I like that boulder. That is a nice boulder. – Donkey

I’ll stick with you! – Donkey

This is the part where you run away. — Shrek

[To Dragon] What’s the matter? You got somethin’ in your eye? – Donkey

Oh this is another one of does onion things isn’t – Donkey

no this is one of does drop it and leave it alone things – Shrek/Blind Mouse

You, uh… you don’t entertain much, do you? – Donkey

There’s an arrow in your butt. – Princess Fiona

I like my privacy. — Shrek

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