50+ Funny Military Quotes To Appreciate Them

funny military quotes

We all know that the main motive of the army is to serve all the people and provide complete safety to the national interests and also handle all the military responsibilities.

They always protect the country from every type of danger. In this article, we are going to tell you Funny military quotes. Basically, all the military quotes always increase your love for the military and make it very strong.

For your kind information, every military person contains incredible stamina and courage. The military person who never feared pain or death is called the bravest person in the whole world.

We all know that the war is a place where death and life meet together, at that time everything is collapse and too many people live lost.

However, it is also a time that finds the flawless people who lead the other people to victory with the help of their mind and strong stamina.

The most amazing military quotes for these types of leaders are given in this article, if you are a military person or loves the military then you should read all these best online quotes.

It is an obvious thing that our military justifies to be appreciated all the time. Just because of the fearless military we and our families enjoy freedom, this happens because the brave military persons will protect us and our family.

Most of the military soldiers have had the sacrifice of their lives just because they want us to live in a free society.

We all know that it always requires the too much sacrifice and courage that our soldiers do. Our soldiers also have their families and they leave them just because of our safety and freedom.

So, read the complete article to know about the military quotes, all these are present to appreciate our soldiers.

Funny Military Quotes

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

When I lost my rifle, the Army charged me 85 dollars. That is why in the Navy the Captain goes down with the ship.

The direct use of force is such a poor solution to any problem, it is generally employed only by small children and large nations.

The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.

It will be a great day when our schools have all the money they need, and our air force has to have a bake sale to buy a bomber.

I am not fond of speaking about politics because I don’t have in my possession an army of 200,000 soldiers.

My fellow Americans. I’ve signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.

Our bombs are smarter than the average high school student. At least they can find Kuwait.

Funny Military Sayings

Funny Military Sayings

The reason the American Army does so well in wartime, is that war is chaos, and the American Army practices it on a daily basis.

Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.

We, the willing, led by the unknowing, are doing the impossible for the ungrateful. We have now done so much for so long with so little, we are now capable of doing anything with nothing.

Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons!

Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can’t get out.

Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake.

War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.

If the enemy is in range, so are you.

We are not retreating—we are advancing in another direction

The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.

Funny Military Phrases

Funny Military Phrases

  1. Ally

A word which describes how cool someone or their equipment looks, usually their battlefield fashion. Those serving in the special forces have automatic ‘ally’ status.

  1. Threaders

Angry or fed up.

  1. Hoofing

Excellent or amazing.

  1. Gleaming

To describe something as good, desirable or brilliant. A particular favourite of the Guards Division. If something is ‘gleaming’ you’re probably onto a good thing.

  1. Dhobi Dust

(Navy/Army/RAF) Slang term for washing powder. The Indian word ‘dobi’ meaning ‘washing’ or ‘laundry’ has been used ever since the British military were stationed there.

  1. Egg Banjo

A fried egg sandwich, so called because when it is eaten, generally with the one hand that is free, egg yolk squirts onto the eater’s shirt/jacket resulting in them raising their sandwich to approximately ear height while they attempt to ‘strum’ the egg from their shirt with their free hand.

  1. Gash

(Navy/Army/RAF) slang for waste/discard able items such as food wrappers.

  1. Gen

Slang for genuine: ‘What’s the gen?’ – What’s the true gossip?

9, Jack

Workshy or selfish person. For example ‘He’s Jack as f***.’

  1. KFS

Knife, fork and spoon.

Funny Military Quotes Leadership

Funny Military Quotes Leadership

It doesn’t take a hero to order men into battle. It takes a hero to be one of those men who goes into battle.

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader.

Be willing to make decisions. That’s the most important quality in a good leader.

Great powers don’t get angry, great powers don’t make decisions hastily in a crisis.

Clarity and simplicity are the antidotes to complexity and uncertainty.

You manage things; you lead people.

It is necessary for us to learn from others’ mistakes. You will not live long enough to make them all yourself.

Never give an order that can’t be obeyed.

Never tell people how to do things. Tell them what to do and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.

The most important single ingredient in the formula of success is knowing how to get along with people

Funny Military Quotes From Movies

You have to think about one shot. One shot is what it’s all about.

Keep the sand out of your weapons, keep those actions clear. I’ll see you on the beach.

Are you smoking this sh-t so’s to escape from reality? Me, I don’t need this sh-t, I am reality. There’s the way it ought to be, and there’s the way it is.

The Almighty tells me he can get me out of this mess, but he’s pretty sure you’re f–ked.

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Aim small, miss small.

Out here, due process is a bullet!” — Col. Mike Kirby, “The Green Berets.

I feel the need . . . the need for speed.

Each and every man under my command owes me one hundred Nazi scalps… And I want my scalps!

Ideals are peaceful. History is violent.

I ain’t got time to bleed.

Funny Bts Army Quotes

win, lose, I don’t care because at the end of the day I still have this face so who’s the real winner here?”

My handsomeness is staining my life

I am worldwide handsome”

Do you know how hard it is to write on a flip phone, huh?”

I wish I could come here with my girlfriend… but I don’t have one”

I didn’t know fire could be that hot”

You don’t know annyeonghaseyo?”

Even when I’m in the bathroom, I’m thinking of out ARMY

In my next life I want to be born as a rock

I’m you’re hope, I’m you’re angel

funny British military quotes

Time is everything; five minutes make the difference between victory and defeat.

Now God be praised, I will die in peace.

Firstly you must always implicitly obey orders, without attempting to form any opinion of your own regarding their propriety. Secondly, you must consider every man your enemy who speaks ill of your king; and thirdly you must hate a Frenchman as you hate the devil.

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Desperate affairs require desperate measures.

The thing I would most like to see invented is a way of teaching children and grown-ups the difference between right and wrong.

You are as safe with me as you would be in the Bank of England.

Two people could build an outhouse in four hours. They’re not complicated.

A good idea plus capable men cannot fail; it is better than money in the bank.

Jim Reid and I started the company as a design company, as I said earlier, back in ’85 and and we transformed it into a product company in 1995.

I cannot command winds and weather.